Saturday, November 29, 2025
The Thank You Habit
We stood awkwardly and patiently. Two adults focused on the upturned face of a toddler. I had just handed the child a gift. It was not much, and I needed no response. But their parent had just dutifully asked them, “What do you say?” It was obvious that the child knew what to say. But they were at the age where they were having to decide whether or not they would be thankful or a spoiled brat. We waited - for the child’s sake - knowing that “the thank you habit” (if they would be willing to adopt it) would serve them well for their entire lifetime.
Years later I conversed awkwardly with a full-grown adult, waiting for a hint of gratitude. I was part of a group of people who had raised a great deal of money and had done a community service. I was now talking with a person who had benefited from the service, at no cost to them. Unfortunately, all I was hearing at the time was complaints that our group had not been timely enough and we had not carried out the act of service in a way they felt was appropriate. I couldn’t help but wonder how horrible it must be to live in a mindset that would keep you from enjoying the good things that others were doing in the world.
Unthankfulness is a self-imposed sentence of misery. It doesn’t accomplish anything positive. Since we instinctively know it is not positive, maybe we just do it for the endorphins? But there is an alternative that has been recommended and practiced for thousands of years. There are over 150 Bible verses encouraging us to be thankful. Here is one of them:
Colossians 3:15 Let the peace of Christ keep you in tune with each other, in step with each other. None of this going off and doing your own thing. And cultivate thankfulness.
Many readers may have experienced of been close to someone who has experienced depression. One of the tell-tale signs of depression is that people tend to hide away in a dark place. Those who step in to help restore mental and emotional health will often so something very simple but effective: they will open blinds and curtains. The goal is to help the victim of depression to focus on any warmth or light that is available.
Thankfulness is like opening the blinds on a cold winter day. It will still be cold outside, but the sunlight coming through the window will bring some warmth and comfort. The sun is still shining. It takes some effort, but we can focus on any bit of goodness in spite of the pain and suffering that may trigger our sadness.
The holiday season is an wonderful opportunity to find things for which we can be thankful. Our thankfulness will warm our own hearts and save the people whose lives we touch much grief. But it is a habit, so only the intentional will enjoy its fruit.
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